Social media, traffic, and daily life are experiencing an increasing amount of fights and arguments, as emphasized by Etiquette Trainer and Family Counselor Semra Binay. She stated, “There are actually many reasons for disrespect and conflict between people. At the forefront of these reasons is the devaluation of tolerance. Nowadays, when people see gentle, humble, and polite individuals from the past, they label them as outdated, trivial, and old-fashioned.”
While arguing and fighting are inherent in human nature, the increasing state of conflict has reached a societal dimension in recent times. Semra Binay, an Etiquette Trainer and Family Counselor, draws attention to the fact that everyone seems to be in a state of fight in social media, traffic, or in daily life, and she stated that there is no tolerance left between people. Emphasizing the importance of tolerance and respect, Binay provided important tips regarding social media and relationships between men and women. She said, “Lately, there are many reasons for disrespect and conflict between people. At the forefront of these reasons is the devaluation of tolerance. Nowadays, when people see gentle, humble, and polite individuals from the past, they label them as outdated, trivial, and old-fashioned. Therefore, people exhibit more rude and impulsive behaviors to say ‘here I am.’ Labeling someone as naïve when they take the high road and saying ‘let it be as you wish’ as if that person is simple-minded and treating them as someone who can be taken advantage of has led to people displaying rude behaviors. The intense traffic, work stress, financial difficulties, genetically modified foods, unhealthy diet, and air pollution strain our tolerance to some extent because they disrupt our biology. The fast-paced life and getting used to it stem from seeing gentle actions as backward.”
‘We Have Lost Our Human Qualities’
Binay stated that people engage in intense arguments with each other through social media, saying, “Using virtual identities, people engage in severe insults and actions towards each other, saying ‘since I don’t know them anyway.’ They share someone else’s posts without permission. People seem to be constantly ready to argue or fight. This situation arises from being part of the capitalist order. We have become a society that only consumes, eats, drinks, and sleeps. We live like other animals, not exclusively to us. We have lost our human qualities, and respect is given to people based on their material value. In daily life, there is a robotic lifestyle of only eating, drinking, and sleeping, and I believe that these fights stem from that. The primary cause of anger is the concern for livelihood. On social media, some people feel inadequate due to seeing others in a favorable light. Not being able to allocate time to oneself and not being able to allocate time to the people they are responsible for gives rise to a feeling of ‘I am not enough’ and suppresses the person to some extent. These situations also lead to uncontrolled anger.”
‘Patience Belt Should Be Buckled in Traffic’
Binay also touched upon the arguments that occur in traffic, saying, “When we get in a car, we put on a seatbelt, but the biggest belt is, in my opinion, the belt of patience. When someone makes a move or squeezes you, think to yourself that person is trying to reach an urgent place or they don’t know the way. There is no need for so much impatience. They squeeze inexperienced drivers. There is no need to do things that will cause trouble for people we will never see again. Understanding is essential in traffic.”
‘Do Not Load Negatives to Yout Children’
Binay also warned the families, stressing that parents should not paint a very pessimistic picture for their children. Binay said, “Children have no hope for the future. Therefore, we need to talk about our own concerns with the children. We need to spend quality time with them, even if it is half an hour. If we are smiling, that negative energy in us will not pass on to our children. There should be no fighting in the presence of children, but unfortunately, children are afraid of their parents. He sees them fighting. Unfortunately, not every child is lucky to see his mother and father kissing and hugging. It is necessary not to burden children with more responsibilities than they can do. Also, the virtual world has led to very rapid consumption. You can meet a person on the other side of the world, we now have easy access to information. Alternatives have also multiplied. No one is trying to solve the problem in their relationship due to the idea that ‘I will meet someone else instead of enduring this’.